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Carmela D'Amore's avatar

Love this @Carolyn Tate this is you to a T❤️

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Change Agent's avatar

Great article! I agree, women need to avoid subconsciously accepting "their role" as defined by misogynistic men. Likewise, we men need to always be conscious of our ingrained misogyny, no matter how open we may think we are to women taking their rightful place in leading society in a new direction.

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Carolyn Tate's avatar

I think it’s really tough to have conversations with men about this without them feeling personally attacked. I’d love to have a forum to discuss this in some way. I once broached the subject with my 86 year old father who banged his fist on the table and said angrily and loudly, when I dared to discuss gender equality, “I suppose you’re one of those feminists!” 😔 😔 😢

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Change Agent's avatar

Yes, it would be good to be able to talk between genders like that. Unfortunately, the only men that would join such a forum would be men who already believed in gender equality, or trolls.

While I was (and still am) far from perfect, I have always had a strong sense of justice. On taking on my first real job, back in 1967, I remember being shocked when I saw the union agreed wage scales. There were two columns for each job, one for male rates and one for female (about 2/3 the male rate if I recall correctly).

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Carolyn Tate's avatar

It’s hard to press the “heart” button to that. Two columns for the ultimate discrimination. But thank you for being a feminist fighting for women’s rights!

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Change Agent's avatar

I’ve never described myself as a feminist actually. But if one calls me one, then I guess I am!

I think before a man calls himself a feminist he should be nominated as one by a female! 🙂

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Kiya Taylor's avatar

Such a powerful message filled with practical reminders. Thank you Carolyn. I’ll be sharing this to family — who often giggle at my sternness about the kind of language I want around my 18 month old daughter, who they often like to remark is “as bossy as her mum.” I don’t want her to grow up with the shame I’ve felt about being confident, determined and strong in the clarity of what she wants or doesn’t want. I want her to soften into owning her whole self. Never has deconstructing the patriarchy and dismantling these internalised misogynies been as important to me as they are now that I’m a mum. Thank you again for sharing.

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Carolyn Tate's avatar

Love that! I hope your family gets it. I haven’t even shared it with mine. Now maybe I might! Sing it sister. 😃 ❤️

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Annabel Preston's avatar

This this this! Such a brilliant piece, Carolyn. The "good girl" mentality is so hard to deconstruct!

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Carolyn Tate's avatar

Oh yes it is! Always lurking around she is. Good girl be gone! 🪄 🪄 🪄

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Jennifer Mackenzie's avatar

Great reminder to watch out for your "good girl" taking over. I've always been bit of a rule breaker but my good girl is always lurking.

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